Hole in my heart

Hole in my heart long poem

These days, as I wake up,
an eagle sits on my window.

‘tell me, my eagle,
tell me the tales of distant flowers,
of dragons, of dangerous people,
with beards, with spears.
tell me of their loves and dreams and aches.
tell me everything.
tell me, my eagle,
tell me the tales that lie beyond the seas and the skies’.

And the eagle says to me,
‘oh! I would if I could!
but there is a hole in your heart
that my tales can’t fill’.

these days, as I lie down,
the moon halts by my window.

‘tell me, my moon,
tell me about love, but also tell me it’s loneliness.
tell me about waves, but also tell me their longing.
tell me about kisses and clouds,
but also tell me about poisons and thunders and arrows
and mad dogs running inside heads.
tell me everything.
tell me, my moon,
tell  me about the worlds that lie beneath the words and the songs’.

and the moon says to me,
‘oh! I would if I could!
but, there is a hole in your heart
that my worlds can’t fill’.

these days, I walk and walk
till a wave falls at my feet.

‘tell me, my wave,
tell me about sharks and their sharp teeth.
tell me about dolphins and mermaids and porpoises
and lovely flowers that eat up fishes.
tell me about giant whales, fierce piranhas,
shrewd octopuses and innocent turtles.
tell me everything.
tell me, my wave,
tell me about things that live beyond the sun and the moon’.

and the wave says to me,
‘oh! I would if I could!
but there is a hole in your heart
that my ocean can’t fill’.

these days, I walk and walk
till I come face to face with a mountain.

‘tell me, my mountain.
tell me about earthquakes and dinosaurs.
tell me about volcanoes and artists.
tell me about sages and their secrets.
tell me about warriors and their swords.
tell me about kings and their hundred queens.
tell me about ramas and ravanas and horses and battles and wounds.
tell me everything.
tell me, my mountain,
tell me the legends that live beyond the seasons and the sentiments’.

and the mountain says to me,
‘oh! I would if I could!
but there is a hole in your heart
that my legends can’t fill’.

rama – god, ravana-demon (hindu mythology)

This poem is part of the Poetry Book Oblivion

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Balaji Gopalan

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I owe all of my poetry to the influence of Pablo Neruda. Reading him 10 years ago on the beaches of Goa, gave me the permission to be who I am and write what I feel. My poetry has never been the same after that. All that I write is an offering to Neruda.
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