That short poem

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I will sit or lay. Not in sadness or tears, you don’t understand. I’m in-between everything.
That time I starred at that horse. I wanted to be it so much. Its pensive eyes knew I was not worth a glance. How low am I that the rejection of a horse inspires melancholy in me?
That time I sat in church, the building repairs more important than me!
That risk to feel alive. To fool myself I am above the normals, when even they can see that I am lost. Why not risk life I hear. Too scared my dear, too scared.
That time I studied to become someone. Why can’t I be everyone? I am special but no one will ever know.
That serrated knife I saw, goading me. Buy a tarpaulin to protect the carpet it said. A life of distractions. The pain will be immense when reality dawns.
That man said I was a mouse in a lion’s body. A human thought escaping his clinical performance. Oh to be a mouse. We strive for that peace, that simplicity.
That massive search operation embarked upon for our souls. Sit in a field, maybe it will find you.
That bewildered earth giving up, more in confusion than anything. Starring at a species desperate to progress. Can’t they see they are so far behind?
Technology comes into its own. Grab a laptop, a tablet, grab a magic music machine, and beat your head to a bloody pulp with it. No human can live with the guilt.
I feel I have done something, but needing that feeling makes me realise I have not.
Swimming in the sea I realise I am no one. I know nothing and am just waiting.
I look deeper and deeper. That is it.

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Paul Louth

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I am an obese hairy giant of a man who thinks so much that sometimes i forget that life is still going on. I have written numerous poems that if published would immediately render me unemployable. I live on the edge of society so that normal people can look on in horror without having to get too close. Creativity lights me up and i once killed a pigeon with a brick (After consultation with a vet).
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