The things I never said

The things I never said short poem

You said I was important,
I believed you,
You said I deserved better,
I believed you,
You said I meant everything to you,
I believed you.
Then I moved away,
It was time to put those words into actions.
Days turned into weeks, turned into months,
I saw halting gestures of those words.
I wondered should it be so difficult,
To show me the truth in your words
I questioned, you stalled,
I prodded, you bawled.
All those nasty voices got the better of me
Why oh why is he avoiding me?
I let my emotions take hold of me,
You used that as an excuse to get far away from me
Out I walked, in back again,
Every single time the same story again.
It got better, the dust settled a bit,
And then again I would have a scary fit.
I blamed you, you blamed me,
In the end we both got free.
The price was high, too much to pay,
My dreams got shattered if I may say,
I sit back and think was anything real,
When the pain eases only time will tell,
My heart feels numb, it feels pained
In the end of us what have I gained
Answers my heart slowly again,
Maybe or not you were never ever sane,
Worthless and useless is what I feel,
Its true you have been a bit of a heel.

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Andria D'Souza

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I come from a place of much fear and yearning. Yearing for that little extra that life has to offer which is just within our reach and fear that when faced with that yearning well withing my grasp will I ever have the courage to face up to it.Words have always been a way to make sense of the jumble within, it brings me clarity and makes things a reality. Nothing reflects me better than these words below.I stand watching the waves crash against the shore, leave back some things on the beach and take some things away with it. On and on tirelesslyit goes. "Stop it, stop it now!".But no one is listening. "Don’t take so much away, I'll have nothing left." The sea calls out, "But I’m leaving so many things back." Angry tears spilling over my cheeks I yell, "I don’t want what you have to give, I’m happy with what I have. Take away your so called gifts leave me back with what I had. Give me all that you took away from me, return what you had no right to take." The sea replies, "Not unless you see what I have left you". Strolling along the shore I find the mysteries of worlds far away at my feet, all within my reach. Think to myself I do, can I be mad for the old things been taken away from me when what I have always secretly hoped for is to have the mysteries of the world at my feet. I hear the gentle voice againm "Do you still want me to take it away?". "NO! NO!", escapes before I can control my words. The sea replies "That's what I thought". The sea drenches my feet and moves away digging my feet deeper into the sand.........
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The ups and downs of a relationship, they take their toll, the heartbreak of separation, broken dreams and “The things I never said”…You capture it all @Andria_DSouza


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