It’s 9:00 on a Saturday,
I’m at my PC, wasting my life,
Surrounded by empty snack packets,
And by the door is an empty pizza box.
Life couldn’t be better.
Punctuating my silence, my fixation with my screen.
Something is in the room with me.
A familiar, low, droning buzz.
My eyes narrow and I glance around the room,
Hoping to find this intruder.
I turn around, and I see my target.
And the warrior’s instinct brought on
By 15-and-a-half years of gaming kicks in.
I re-enter the room, armed to the teeth.
Brandishing my yellow, waffle-shaped mace
I am a force to be reckoned with.
It has landed. I line up my attack…
Move in slowly…and swing…
And my mace hits the wall, as the filthy intruder eludes my grasp.
The creature, now aware of my intent, attempts escape.
I give chase, not allowing it a moment’s peace,
Swatting at it with my mace, showing it my war-cry.
The chase continues.
It lands. I take another shot.
And this time, I am on target.
There is no more buzzing. It is done.
The remains of the filthy, disgusting intruder scum
Are grafted to my weapon. I am victorious.
Mopping my brow, I place my armament back on its rack.
And so once again I return to my PC,
To chat with some friends,
Play some games maybe,
Perhaps even write a poem or two while I have the time.
I let the air in through an open window.
I breathe in and let out a deep sigh.